Cumming Dentist Psychological Effects of Divorce on Children

Published: 17th May 2011
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Most parents worry about the emotional effects of divorce on children. They may be worried enough to decide divorce is not "the right thing to do" and try to save their marriage. They may recognize that divorce is inevitable but be plagued with concern about how it is affecting their children.

Parents should then have a clear idea of what exactly the psychological effects of divorce on their children may be. They can then make a sound decision about divorce and work throughout divorce to minimize or avoid them altogether.

Rejected
Children of divorce may feel rejected and unloved by the parent who has left. The reason for this is because children consider themselves as the center if the universe. This makes them believe that whatever happens has something to do with them.

At fault
As a result of this, the children may think that something they said or did, or just the way they are, may have been the cause of the divorce and leave them feeling a deep sense of guilt and shame. Teens who are going through a rough time may think that their behavior has contributed to the divorce and made it easier for a parent to leave.


Powerless
Because they believe that they are responsible for the problems, children also believe that they can fix things. They try becoming more helpful and appeal with the belief that they have the ability to keep their parents together and they try hard to be better children. Once they realize that this will not happen and that their often elaborate plans and hopes for reconciliation have failed, the children feel powerless and upset that they cannot make a difference.

Stressed
Children may feel stressed and under pressure to do more than they can realistically cope with at a time that is already stressful enough during divorce. They may be burdened with extra responsibilities whether they like it or not or they may take up extra duties around the house. They may also be used as a confidante and advisor by one or both parents, a role that even teens are not qualified for or comfortable with. They may hide how stressed they really are in their eagerness to help out and to look grown up.


Lonely
Children of divorce may feel lonely. They may miss the intimacy, comfort and particular parenting skills of the absent parent. The parent at home may be so wrapped up in their own problems that they are not available to their children. They may not have contact with their usual playmates because of what is happening around them. Children may seek intimacy and comfort elsewhere, or become withdrawn.

Angry
Specific events and changes, emotions that children are not equipped to manage or express, is a common emotional effect of divorce cause anger by a lack of understanding or acceptance of the divorce. The anger in children is not always shown. The reasons for the divorce are not so obvious when it brings to an end a low-conflict marriage can bring this anger out. Because they term the divorce as unnecessary, the children end-up hating their parents for doing it.


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